Neither here nor there

[pavlovdog]

 so locking in was a lie. What the fuck am I going with my time. Besides playing a lot of resident evil and working? Nothing. Fuck man, 1 day and I have my doctors appointment. No change  in weight loss from what I can see. And I’m also getting off these meds regardless.. stuttering and brain fog is a consistent issue recently because of it, that and the lack of weight loss itself,  I just can’t do it anymore. Maybe they can put me on something different. Something that will curb my appetite at least, because that’s the only problem. I have a binge eating disorder and man it’s just hard sometimes to just, not eat. Can’t even starve myself because Jfc I’m just so hungry. I just can’t force myself to do it anymore like it used to be. But fuck it man, I keep saying things will get better, and they will. They will

besides all the bullshit, I just recently finished the original re4 a couple days ago, now halfway though re3r, although I accidentally deleted the fucking game, how ???   thankfully I wont have to restart but still, I don’t even know if I want to continue it, it’s too fast paced, story line is meh. And on top of that, I’m stuck on a part that I just can’t get past. No ammo, or heals, what the fuck am I going to do :’) but I want to finish it solely because I want to complete all the RE games. I’ve played 2r , the original 4, 4r , 5 , 6, some of 7 but tbh I’m too scared of that one for some reason, though I said the same thing about the third one because nemesis runs, terrifying. And haven’t touched 8 nor seen too much gameplay on it. All I know is that Chris comes back so yay!! Still can’t play overwatch and I’m losing my mind. Bought the battle pass for nothing I suppose. Fuck. Soon maybe. It’s not like, completely unplayable. Just lagging hella, which I guess I can just play arcade? So it doesn’t really matter? I just want to finish my bp. I gave up on comp.

other than that, work still sucks. I hate my gm. My boyfriend was in the hospital not long ago, still kinda traumatized from coming home to find him, what I thought was dead. Still a horrible experience to call 911 and all of that. He’s been irritated with me recently and I don’t know what I did. Like he’s pushing me away. But still says he loves me? Yeah whatever. I don’t know what to do anymore. Hell does anybody?